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It is assumed that the woman must wait motionless until she is wooed. That is how the spider waits for the fly.

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The fickleness of the woman I love is equalled by the infernal constancy of the women who love me.

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If you want to tell people the truth, make them laugh, otherwise they'll kill you.

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The heart of an Irishman is nothing but his imagination

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Dying is a troublesome business: there is pain to be suffered, and it wrings one's heart; but death is a splendid thing—a warfare accomplished, a begi...more

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Love is a gross exaggeration of the difference between one person and everybody else.

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When a thing is funny, search it carefully for a hidden truth.

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There is no love sincerer than the love of food.

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The true artist will let his wife starve, his children go barefoot, his mother drudge for his living at seventy, sooner than work at anything but his ...more

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What you are to do without me I cannot imagine.

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The truth sticks in our throats with all the sauces it is served with: it will never go down until we take it without any sauce at all.