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After that, he tried to go upstairs through the broom cupboard, and then the yard. This seemed to puzzle him a little. But finally he discovered the s...more

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This book will prove the following ten facts:1. A Goon is a being who melts into the foreground and sticks there.2. Pigs have wings, making them hard ...more

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I am a believer in free will. If my dog chooses to hate the whole human race except myself, it must be free to do so.

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I can't abide people who go soft over animals and then cheat every human they come across!

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Tell me of this Wizard Howl of yours". Sophie's teeth chattered but she said proudly, "He's the best wizard in Ingary or anywhere else. If he'd only h...more

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Jamal stared at the dog in his arms. "Why I am I holding a dog full of angels?

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The demon at length fell to singing a gentle, flickering little song. It was not in any language Sophie knew - or she thought not, until she distinctl...more

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My shining dishonesty will be the salvation of me.

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Nothing is safe from you. If I were to court a girl who lived on an iceberg in the middle of the ocean, sooner or later— probably sooner— I’d look up ...more

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I feel ill," [Howl] announced. "I'm going to bed, where I may die.

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You must admit I have a right to live in a pigsty if I want.

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He gave Sophie the smile which had no doubt charmed the Witch of the Waste and possibly Lettie too, firing it along the fork, across the cream, straig...more

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Wizard Howl," said Wizard Suliman. "I must apologize for trying to bite you so often. In the normal way, I wouldn't dream of setting teeth in a fellow...more

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What a strange family you are! Is your name Lettie too?

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Really, these wizards! You'd think no one had ever had a cold before! Well, what is it?" she asked, hobbling through the bedroom door onto the filthy ...more