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I've met a lot of people who've lost their jobs and they still have a sense of humor.

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I wish I could know everything ever, like that would be my wish - that's what I hope heaven is, that they tell you who shot JFK and all that stuff.

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If you're a woman and a guy's ever said anything romantic to you, he just left off the second part that would have made you sick if you could have hea...more

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When I take my kids out for dinner or lunch, people smile at us.

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Well, when I was younger, I lied all the time, because once you understand the power of lying, it's really like magic because you transform reality fo...more

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Breaking records is not something you expect to be doing. That's like a sports thing, it's not usually a comedy and writing thing.

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It's more fun to experience things when you don't know what's going to happen.

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It's a positive thing to talk about terrible things and make people laugh about them.

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I think you have to try and fail, because failure gets you closer to what you're good at.

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I'm bored' is a useless thing to say. You live in a great, big, vast world that you've seen none percent of.

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I've learned from experience that if you work harder at it, and apply more energy and time to it, and more consistency, you get a better result. It co...more

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I've met a lot of people who've lost their jobs and they still have a sense of humor.

"

I wish I could know everything ever, like that would be my wish - that's what I hope heaven is, that they tell you who shot JFK and all that stuff.

"

If you're a woman and a guy's ever said anything romantic to you, he just left off the second part that would have made you sick if you could have hea...more

"

When I take my kids out for dinner or lunch, people smile at us.