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Guilt is just as powerful, but its influence is positive, while shame's is destructive. Shame erodes our courage and fuels disengagement.

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It is easy to see how quickly expectations become layered, competitive and conflicting. This is how the shame web works. We have very few realistic op...more

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When I look at narcissism through the vulnerability lens, I see the shame-based fear of being ordinary. I see the fear of never feeling extraordinary ...more

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Worrying about scarcity is our culture's version of post-traumatic stress. It happens when we've been through too much, and rather than coming togethe...more

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After doing this work or the past twelve years and watching scarcity ride roughshod over our families, organizations, and communities, I'd say the one...more

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Numb the dark and you numb the light.

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Given the dark fears we feel when we experience loss, nothing is more generous and loving than the willingness to embrace grief in order to forgive. T...more

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Fear of the Dark I’ve always been prone to worry and anxiety, but after I became a mother, negotiating joy, gratitude, and scarcity felt like a full-t...more