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I haven't spoken to my wife in years. I didn't want to interrupt her.

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My wife wants sex in the back of the car and she wants me to drive.

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It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass.

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My marriage is on the rocks again, yeah, my wife just broke up with her boyfriend.

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With my wife I don't get no respect. I made a toast on her birthday to 'the best woman a man ever had.' The waiter joined me.

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A girl phoned me the other day and said... 'Come on over, there's nobody home.' I went over. Nobody was home.

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I told my wife the truth. I told her I was seeing a psychiatrist. Then she told me the truth: that she was seeing a psychiatrist, two plumbers, and a ...more

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My wife met me at the door the other night in a sexy negligee. Unfortunately, she was just coming home.