Foibles Quotes

When compelled to cook I produce a meal that would make a sword swallower gag.

If I only had a little humility I'd be perfect.

I am free of all prejudice. I hate everyone equally.

No one can have a higher opinion of him than I have - and I think he's a dirty little beast.

Everyone is ignorant only on different subjects.

I have a simple philosophy: Fill what's empty. Empty what's full. And scratch where it itches.

Show me someone who never gossips and I'll show you someone who isn't interested in people.

I have my standards. They may be low but I have them.

I figure you have the same chance of winning the lottery whether you play or not.

Some people see the cup as half empty. Some people see the cup as half full. I see the cup as too la...

Mercifully one forgets one's love affairs as one forgets one's dreams.

I may have faults but being wrong ain't one of them.

I have too much respect for the truth to drag it out on every trifling occasion.

We'd all like a reputation for generosity and we'd all like to buy it cheap.

I believe in practicing prudence at least once every two or three years.

At home I am a nice guy but I don't want the world to know. Humble people I've found don't go ver...

I always read the last page of a book first so that if I die before I finish I'll know how it turne...

I love that you get cold when it's 71 degrees out. I love that it takes you an hour and a half to or...

I was once thrown out of a mental hospital for depressing other patients.